Italy: Mozzarella, Bed Bugs and Overpriced Glass

We took the train from Salzburg to Innsbruck to Venice.  The trip from Innsbruck to Venice was around six hours, so we had purchased first-class tickets, hoping for comfy seats for sleeping.  WELL, this was not the case.  We first get on the train and we are in first-class, but with no seat assignments.  So, we pick this random cabin full of Germans.  The train-ticketing-dude comes into the cabin and gets mad at us because we don't have "reservations."  Well, dude, we have a ticket for two people in first class.  What more do you want from us!?  So, he sighs heavily at us and says, "Well, we may not have seats available.  You HAVE to have a reservation."  He leaves, comes back ten minutes later and has found two seats for us one cabin over.  This cabin is full of Americans, which was weird because I really didn't see/hear many Americans on the entire trip in Europe.  So we sit.  I am next to a HUGE dude taking over half of my seat and blocking my window view and Brian is in between two old women.  SCREW THIS FIRST CLASS BS.  We decide to go to the dining car and get some food/drinks.  Here we are in the dining car.

We ate and had a few glasses of wine.  Brian decided he was going back to the overcrowded cabin to nap.  Not me.  I was having too much fun in the dining car.  Drinking at 100km per hour with beautiful Italy outside of the window?  I'm not sleeping through this!  So, I'm sitting there, drinking my wine and a dude walks in the dining car.  There are no seats available, so I offer him one of mine.  I was at a 4-top by myself.  He sits and I find out that he and his wife live in Verona.  He travels back and forth to Innsbruck where he is a Latin professor.  Very nice dude.  Anyways, he gets off of the train in Verona (about an hour before Venice) and Brian finally wakes up and comes back to the dining car.  He got to see some of the views, but missed a lot of the mountains through Austria.  Weird experience:  I saw a lady give her two year old a cup of coffee.  It was not hot chocolate...it was coffee.

So, we get off the train and say goodbye to our train companions from the cabin.  I told them I was ready to "....eat and drink everything Venice had to offer."  We begin our trek across Venice to the bed & breakfast.  It is during this hike that I am truly thankful to Brian for being adamant about backpacking instead of suitcasing for this trip.  We went up and down at least thirty bridges and it would have been hell with rolling suitcases.  So, yes Brian, you were right.  During our walk to the B&B, a man gives me a rose.  I tell him I don't want it because I didn't want to pay for a rose...that was a glass of wine I could be having.  He tells me I don't have to pay for it.  SWEET, right?  Then he goes up to Brian and asks him for money.  Ugh.

So, we make it to the B&B, Hotel Barbaro.  I read the reviews telling me how to check into this place, fortunately.  If I hadn't we would have been screwed.  The B&B is located above a restaurant that is owned by the B&B peeps.  So, you have to go into the restaurant, find a waitress or bartender, tell them you would like to check in, they leave their station, walk you upstairs, show you the room and go back to work.  Here is a photo of the room.

Once we unpacked a bit, we decided to walk around and get some dinner.  We sat on the Grande Canal and ate Caprese Salads (Mozzarella, Tomato & Basil).  I ate at least two of these a day.  We had some wine and make our way back to the B&B.  We learned that, unlike what you see in movies, "Thank You," is not pronounced "Grazi!"  The correct pronunciation is "Grazie!"  (gratz-eee-yay).  There is your language lesson for the day.  We went back to the restaurant under the B&B, ate, drank and went to sleep.  Our room overlooked a courtyard that had a restaurant and accordion player doing his thing until well past midnight.  Since there were no AC's in the building, we had to leave the window open.  We were serenaded to sleep every night.  It was pretty damn cool.

The next morning we woke up to church bells ringing...55 times...in a row.  I counted.  We showered and I dried my hair with this...

We took an autotaxi to Murano, an island just off of Venice.  As soon as you get off of the taxi, there are dudes directing you into their glass-making show.  It was pretty awesome.  We saw a guy make a glass horse in under twenty seconds.  Check this out...

TWENTY SECONDS.  These guys are talented.  So after you watch them do the demo, they shuttle you like cattle into the showroom.  Brian and I had already decided that we were going to buy a piece of glass as a souvenir from Venice.  Pffffffffffft.  One look at the prices and I was floored.  BUT, we continue "Oooohing and Aaaahing" at everything.  The salesman sees this and pounces!  He starts telling all of these love stories about each piece being Romeo and Juliet and then the asshole takes us into the "back room."  The back room is roped off for the high rollers, which we were NOT and we told him everything in there was way over our budget.  "Oh no, for you, I make special price....Only $8000."  It was difficult getting out of there, but we decided to go check out some more of the island and get some lunch.  We ran into our train-cabin-mates and they ask me if I got to eat and drink everything Venice had to offer.  I told them I was only about halfway there.  :)  I go to find a bathroom or something and come back to find Brian going into another "back room" where the expensive shit is.  UGH!  But, this time it was awesome.  The guy was bored and took us to their museum upstairs.  It was amazing!  I see this huge guitar made of glass and fall in love.  He tells us that Mick Jagger bought a custom made one just last year from them.

We get back to Venice and decide to go on a gondola ride after dinner (Caprese Salad).  It was $80 usd.  We bring a bottle of wine and Brian brings a cigar.  We learn that Venice is made up of 118 islands and were joined slowly, starting 800 years ago by over 400 bridges.  Our driver was third generation gondola captain.  The boat we were in was originally his grandfather's.  In the winter, the water is above the streets and people wear rain boots everywhere.  Here are some pics from our gondola adventure:

After the gondola ride, we were hungry and Brian wanted chicken alfredo.  That's not a normal dish in Venice, so he had to get out the trusty Google Translator to ask the waiter if they had it.  They did!  We ate pasta like bosses.  It was so delicious.  After dinner, we were doing some window shopping and Brian sees a store he must go into.  It was a store of paper...leather bound journals, stationary and whatnot.  I'm waiting for Brian to find something he wants and all of the sudden, I see something I had to have!  HAD TO.  It was a wax stamp and you could have your initial put into it.  We bought an R.  It is seriously the coolest thing ever!  Very Game of Thrones of us, right?  Check it...

We went back to the hotel to get some sleep...upon waking up, we had little bites all over us.  What in the world could they be from?  ....bed bugs.  It was too late.  We were checking out and had already been bitten.  Don't ever stay at Hotel Barbaro in Venice, Italy.  That is the moral to this long, drawn out story.

Germany & Austria: Heineken, Unicorns and Steigl

We leave Dubai at the crack of dawn and fly away to Europe!  First stop:  Munich, Germany.  This flight was empty.  Brian took over the four seats in the middle of the plane and made a bed.  He slept for the entire five hour flight.  I watched Silver Linings Playbook and Django Unchained - both very good.  So, halfway through the flight, I order a Heineken.  I THOUGHT it was a German beer, but was quickly scolded for my mistake.  "WE are a GERMAN airline and don't sell Heineken.  Here is your Warsteiner...a GERMAN beer."  She then sternly places the beer on my fold down tray, I take a sip, smile at her and she stomps away.  It tasted like a Heineken.  After Googling, it is from the Netherlands.  My bad, grumpy flight attendant.

We land in Munich around Noon and make our way to grab our luggage and go through customs...fifteen minutes!  WOOT!  Our train to Austria was going to be in three hours.  We found the train information desk and there was a train leaving for Austria in twenty minutes.  We made the change and hauled ass to the station.  The train was two story, so being the touristas that we are, we went up and sat by some old local man who probably wanted to ride in peace, but not on our watch!  We plopped our bags down, took up the seats across from him and started snapping photos.  "OOOOH...AHHHH.  Look!"

We arrive in Salzburg and proceed to rely on Google Maps to assist us in our journey to the hotel.  GOOGLE MAPS CAN EAT IT!  We ended up on the wrong side of town.  We were walking, carrying heavy backpacks, I had to pee, I was starving (which if you know me is a terrible situation) and Google is taking us in circles.  Finally, I walked into a hotel, that Google said was where we were supposed to be, and asked the nice girls for some help.  They gave me a map and we were on our way.  Sidenote:  When I came outside of the hotel to show Brian my beautiful, paper, old-school map, he points to his phone saying it was working now and we needed to take a right.  NO.  EFF GOOGLE.  My beautiful, paper, old-school map said we needed to go left.  We argued, I won, we went left and made it to Hotel Markus Sittikus.  It just jumps out at you, right?

The hotel was boutique-y.  Our room had two doors.  One that was left unlocked on the outside, which you open and about a foot inside of that door, is the door that locks.  It reminded me of a hobbit hole.  We booked our excursion for the next morning and decided to grab some food and sight see for a few hours.  On the way to "Old Town Salzburg" we found this really cool park  Mirabelle Park.  Markus Sittikus, the king back in the day, had the park built for his mistress, Mirabelle.  Very low profile, right?  Here was Brian's favorite part of the park:

Just kidding, this was.  He wanted to feel the grass on his feet, since all we have in Doha is dirt.

Here is a pic of the park in its entirety.  

After this, we went to dinner, where we dined on...wait for it...PORK.  Man, I missed that stuff.  Here are some views of the river in Salzburg.  It's very beautiful.

The next morning, we were picked up by Max at the hotel.  Max was our tour guide for the excursions for the day:  Salt Mining and Berchtesgaden tour.  He was ADORABLE.  He was a little, old, Austrian man with white hair, tiny glasses, a green tweed coat and plaid pants.  ADORABLE, I say.  Unfortunately, this is the only photo I snapped of his cuteness.

We stopped to pick up six more girls that were joining us on the tour.  They were originally from India, but lived in Dubai, so we had some common ground with them.  We drove up through Berchtesgaden, which is the city where Hitler stayed during the war.  His Eagle's Nest is located here, but was closed for tours because of snow.  It is now a restaurant.

Besides this fact, it is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen.  Photos cannot do it justice, but here are a few:

 Overlook to Berchestgaden

 The water is green because of all of the limestone from the salt mines.

 This was originally Hitler's personal cinema.

The building in the background was Hitler's securities' housing.  This bare, flat part in the front is where his house was - then it was blown up.

We then made our way to the salt mine.  We all had to put on the overalls and ride the little train down into the mountain.  It was freezing down there.  Fun facts we learned:  Salt is referred to as "white gold" there and Salzburg actually means City of Salt.  The word "salary" comes from back in the day when people were paid with salt instead of money.  

After the salt mine, we were dropped off in town and decided to make our way back to the hotel to change. It was warming up quickly and we had more stuff to do.  We get to the bus stop that will take us to Markus Sittikus' casa, Hellbrunn Castle, and trick fountain tour. I give the driver twenty euro and he gives me a receipt and change.  I don't pay attention and hand the money to Brian.  Brian looks at me, the receipt and back at me.  "He still owes us ten euro."  Me - "Well, ask him for it."  Brian rolls his eyes.  I hate confrontation and wasn't about to confront a non-English speaking Austrian bus driver.  Brian goes up there and tries to explain to him what happened.  He thinks we only gave him a ten instead of a twenty.  He starts rattling off Austrian and flailing his hands at Brian and reluctantly gives him our change.  I'm pretty sure if I had been listening better, I could have learned some Austrian swear words.

So, this is the best part of the journey...

Stiegl Grapefruit Radler.  DONE.  My search for my favorite beer is over.  It is half beer, half grapefruit juice and I love them.  AND...do you see that building behind it?  That is a 450 year old house, that is a museum, that you can walk around carrying a Stiegl Grapefruit Radler and no one looks at you twice.  "Hey, come on in, we trust you."

OK, I am done raving.  Here are some pics from the Castle and trick fountains.

 This table was where Sittikus would host dinner parties.  He was quite the drunk and would play tricks on his friends.  The seat where the two boys are sitting was his seat, which would stay dry, but the guests seats had hoses in the seat and behind them and would soak you.  I willingly volunteered to get doused.  It was freezing.  

 This is about ten feet wide and ten feet tall.  It's huge and propelled completely by water.  The cranking of the people by the water made so much noise, that he installed a water-powered organ in the back of it to cover the commotion.  This guy was obsessed with water.

Another trick fountain.

This one is just downright creepy.

So, obviously you are going to get wet on this tour.  Some old man was reaming our tour guide because he got wet.  Really, dude?  

After this day, I have decided that I'm going to learn German.  In Doha, if you have light skin, people always speak to you in English.  In Germany and Austria, if you have light skin, they speak to you in German.  Then, you look like an asshole just staring at them saying, "English, please?"  I hated it.  Brian says if I just add an "en" to the end of every word, they will understand.  For example:  May I please have a beer.  Translates:  Mayan I pleasen have a beeren?  Yeah.  He talked like this the entire trip...until we got to Italy, which is a whole other Brian language.  :)

That night, we went to dinner, came back to the hotel, Brian smoked a cigar in the courtyard of our hotel and we went to sleep after a long day.  Next stop...VENICE!